This is the first part of a series of blog posts that I plan to write about a book that I recently read, titled “13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do” by Amy Morin.
This part focuses on the topic “They Don’t Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves”.
The author begins by stating a quote by John Gardner.
Self-pity is easily the most destructive of the non-pharmaceutical. Narcotics, it is addictive, gives momentary pleasure and separates the victim from reality.
The author Amy Morin starts out by introducing Jack, who has gone through a terrible accident. His mother was since then very worried about Jack. Every single day she would bring about the topic of his accident and how bad it was. Doctors had predicted complete recovery of his legs and he could return to school, but his mother was constantly worried that she would have to quit her job and homeschool Jack. This made Jack more mentally tired than he already was after the accident.
Since he was now homeschooled, he would spend most of his time playing video games and his mood had completely changed from a happy boy to an irritable one. His mother took him to a therapist and then told her about Jack’s accident. Instead of showing sympathy, the therapist cracked a joke which made Jack smile for the first time.
Over the next few weeks Jack and the therapist worked together and soon Jack was back. This is how the author tells us that instead of feeling sorry about the situation, take charge of it and act upon it.
Then later in the chapter the author tells us that instead of a wife crying on her husbands birthday, she took charge of the day and did what her husband would do…(Lincoln and his birthday celebration).
She has even told why we sometimes pity ourselves and why we do not want to take charge of the situation. She also says that we should replace the thoughts that encourage self pity.
According to the author, we should exchange self pity with gratitude. This is how the author explains us about how self pity affects us and how it makes a bad situation worse.